Do you ever get to that point where you just feel so run down?
That is exactly how I feel at the minute. I have so much that I need to sort and no time to do any of it or it's something that I can't control. Last week I had a lot going on I had Doctor appointments which I thought would be something of nothing and now it turns out I could have a few things but they can't tell me until they re-test again in 3-6 months!! That for me is a long time to worry about something and it really hurt when the the Doctor called me fat! I'm trying my hardest what more do they want?
Another thing that is really getting to me is work. I'm due to go back to work on the 29th of May, however I don't even know if I will be going back. I have been trying for month to sort out flexible working hours so that I can arrange affordable childcare. I explained to my manager and HR that I needed this sorting asap as childcare is hard to find and that the hours I'm due to go back to I physically can not do (3:15pm-11pm sleep there 8am-3:30pm 5 days over 7). I find out Monday in a meeting if they will accept my flexible working hours that I submitted which still leaves me struggling for childcare as they have left it far too late, my son's school has a year waiting list for after school club and the nursery has no space for my daughter. I have looked at childminders but the cost is way out of my price range and made me realise I'm defiantly in the wrong job.
My kids are being a bit testing as of late which too is causing me a lot of stress and the feeling of just giving up! I'm finding less and less time for myself these day which although I don't mind when it comes to spending time with the boyfriend I just want to go to sleep as I'm exhausted. Saying that I have picked up a few hobbies, crochet and sewing. I'm finding my blog is getting neglected a little which is upsetting as I love writing this little blog of mine and hope to get it more noticed. I don't want to be the next blogger with a book deal and giving up my job but I would like to get a few more readers and sustain a better traffic flow and talk with more PR people. I want to write more risky topics about family life, you know the stuff that most people won't mention in case it paints them in a bad light. I'm currently working on a piece about swearing in front and at your children and if it actually makes a difference to them, I don't think it does if I'm honest.
So that is all I just wanted to get something out there something that says I'm ok I'm still here but I'm just run down and have no time. I have a few reviews coming up and a giveaway.